The Lost City of Zinj
Week 1-Research Labratory, San Francisco
The following is a firsthand account of my personal experiences with primates(both human and ape).
My first subject wan an orangutan named Tybalt. Tybalt had grown in an environment with friendly human doctors and very few wild primates, save for a few mental patients. It should also be noted that Tybalt possesed a rare ability to communicate with me and a few others at the labratory using sophisticated computers and forms of American sign language. Now, when Tybalt was asked to sort his own picture in among humans and other apes, he did so correctly except every time, he placed his own picture with the humans.
Furthermore, Tybalt's human companions had been precious to him.
To reduce further stress, anxiety, and trauma to Tybalt, we released him back into captivity for $50,000.
My second subject, a young female mountain gorilla named Kate captivated me, I knew I had to study further-(Cont. in week 2)
Week 2-Research Labratory, San Francisco
The study of Amy began promptly the next day.
I came to know a young mountain gorilla named Jessie. Now Jessie had been an infant when last we made contact, and I believe there was a feint emotional attachment between us.
Jessie too, possesed the ability to communicate effectively with myself and others. And as time progressed she learned far more words than Tybalt, approximately 600 using American Sign language alone.
I found this simply breathtaking.
Although the most intriuging trait that Jessie possesed was her ability to paint. I noticed, over time, that her paintings began to reveal other mountain gorillas, specifically gorillian male genitalia.
Upon realization that Jessie must now be yearning for her own environment and a mate, I took it upon myself to escort her to the local night club, where we danced the night away.
That night I recorded her snoring and sighing sounds. I used the lab's supercomputer to decipher the meaning of these seemingly random sounds. Exactly as I expected, absolutley nothing. With this, I then pondered and realized that the ignorant homosexual society and gay marriages near by must be interfering with my studies somehow. (For the not-so-well read person this last paragraph was pure sarcasm.)-(Cont. in Week 3)
Week 3- Airport/ Airplane/ Arrival in Morocco
Day 1- Airport
It was upon the third week of my diary entries, that I took it upon myself to take Jessie to the Congo rain forest regoin of Africa. There she would be able to find a mate and possibly teach her offspring her talents of communication and perhaps someday, the barrier of communication between humans and other primates would be broken violently.
My research had been funded by a french entrepenuer named Sir Guillame De Eveque, who will be called Gully from now on.
As we waited in the airport lounge for our plane, Gully described to us, through his thick french accent, his previous expeditions into the African rain forests. His most recent expedition he lost two-thirds of his party to cannibals and disease and he had not returned since. His stories did not discourage me though, I had on hand the latest in jungle survival technology and techniques.
Gully was more than happy to fund the whole expedition.
On the plane, the pilot announced our destination of New York, and Morocco.
During the middle of the flight, just when I thought there could possibly be no explicit sexual content in this story, I noticed the stuartist's extremly slutty dress. The stuartist politley accepted my proposal of roast beef and we dined in first class.
Day 4- New York
The day passed uneventfully.
It was 5:00 am Pacific standard time when we arrived in Morocco. Upon arrival on the Libyan border we were pursued by Libyan border patrol due to our lack of passports. We were captured shortly thereafter.
When I awoke I knew not of where I was or how I had been put there. I was blinded by a blinding light and bound to a table. Fortunatley Jessie was able to seduce the guards, and when the guards tried to have their way with her she used her Jiu-Jitsu to subjigate them. I freed Gully and we escaped. Our escape did not go unnoticed however, we were pursued.
Driving a Ford Focus along the dirt road to the nearest airport, I could make out several jeeps behind us, closing fast.
Gully reached for his "What to do when you are being pursued by Libyan border patrol: Tactics and Training" Handbook. I shot him a glance and he pulled out his Maxim heavy machine gun, which he somehow concealed in his toga.
"Viva la France!" Gully screamed as he jumped out the car, bullets blazing.
Damnit, I thought, where am I going to get the money to fly to the Congo rain forest.
"Don't worry Amy...I mean uhh Ka...Jessie, were going to get you home." I said aloud.(Cont. in week 4)
Week 4- Jump/ Moruti/ Zinj
Day 1- Libyan Airport
The mercanaries I had hired at the airport loaded the equpiment into crates. I knew that some of them not might make it, in fact I estimate that somehow only I would survive in the end with only a gorgoues woman to comfort me.
We set out with 12 mercanaries, including Munro Kelly, always referred to as "Munro Kelly" by his contemporaries because...
Gully had refered to Munro in one of his stories as I recalled, it was Munro that got the rest of his party out of the jungle alive.
"I'm not sure", Said Munro. "The Congo is a damned dangerous place to be right now, the Kigani are eating people. And your ape seems to have started her period."
Sure enough Jessie had a two month's supply of tampons at hand.
We took off shortly afterwords.
As we approaced Moruti I prepared, with Jessie, to jump from the plane, as the locals were extremley hostile and armed with SAM missles.
"Where's the airfield?" I asked Munro. "There is no airfield." Answered Munro.
"What, are we going toland in the Jungle?" I asked confused.
"No. From here on we continue on foot."
And even before Munro answered I realized then that I had not yet brushed my teeth. I later learned that we were to jump out of the plane.
Several random extras jumped before they realized they had not parachutes. They fell screaming as I had predicted.
Next I jumped, fastend my seatbelt, was allocated a parachute and a dart gun with several darts. As I pulled the chute open I was lifted from my free fall and glided smoothly into the heart of Moruti.
I lost concioiusness as I hit the ground.
When at last I regained conciousness I looked around to discover I was in the middle of an encampment.
Jessie signed to me: "Travis fall down, go boom."
I signed back:"Yes, are okay?"
Just then she became very agitated and signed:"We go home now, bad gorillas come."
Bad gorillas, I thought to myself. She must mean humans of course.
Munro Understood the risks. The minute they left the aircraft they also left civilization. They were jumping not only through air but through time, backword into a more primitive way of life.
That is why when he saw the Lare, male, silverback gorrila he was terrified. He recalled the myths that entire expeditions had been devoured by such beasts.
Munro was now in a small clearing filled with ancient artifacts and jungle all around him. He was with seven mercanaries and the rest of the experts including: Jeremy Wall-Singer(Wassennarre), a Pornatologist, Karen Ross, a Geologist; and everyone else, except for Travis Cole- the Primatologist with the smart-ass gorilla.
Suddenly as if there had been plenty of warning for everyone, Traivs crept back into the middle of the clearing where the mercanaires were making a new camp with perimeter defences.
It was then that I fell asleep next to Jessie.
When I awoke I was astonished to see the amount of perimeter defences around the camp-there were three tripod machine guns-a small electric wire of fence, booby traps, a moat and a three story high castle keep had all been constructed overnight.
"My God." Travis said. "How did you do this?"
"Internet." Responded Jeremy.
Jessie and I strolled out of the camp to find some large, male, silverback, gorllias, but our luck ran ill when we stumbled upon the lost city of Zinj. It was here and only here on the expedition that I encountered a mummy. Although seemingly harmless, the 2,500 year old mummified body proved a difficult obstacle through the city.
I was promptly ambushed by a mummy and mountain gorilla.
I reported my find to Munro and he decided to move the camp via several African elephants to the lost city at once.
The night passed uneventfully.
The Day passed uneventfully.(Cont. in week 5)
Week 5-Zinj / Mukenko (Conclusion)
Day 1- Zinj
When I awoke the day passed uneventfully.
The Pornatologist, Jeremy, discovered a rich deposit of diamonds.
The day passed uneventfully.
The day passed uneventfully, however it was upon the fourth day of the fifth week(today) of the late Sir Gulliame de Eveque's Grande Expedition to the Virunga region of the Congo, that Munro Kelly discovered a massive male, silverback, gorilla. It was breathtaking to see it come out into full view into the clearing outside the camp.
The gorilla proceeded to pound his chest violently and scream at the top of his lungs. This seemed to be summoning more gorillas, as Jessie's anxiety rose.
Only then, did I realize what this meant, I had not flossed yet. More importantly however, gorillas all around us started to encircle the camp. I had never recalled any primate, espcially gorillas to be this aggressive.
Amy ran into one of the tents, and it was then that the large male silver back gorilla charged into the camp. The perimeter defence had been deactivated for some reason. The gorilla was brandishing two stone paddles in his hand with which he crushed the skull of one of the random mercanaries, who fell deadly silent.
What followed was a defeaning activation of the perimeter defences and gorillas scrambling into the camp all around us. The chaos was undescribable, gorillas being brutally slain everywhere I looked, as I saw the large alpha male, silverback, gorilla charge at me brandishing those bloody stone paddles. I flipped the catridges into the clip of the dart gun as Munro had shown me and emptied the chamber into the gorilla. It had no effect. The gorilla continued to charge and I was knocked unconcouis from behind.
When I awoke I had come to the conclusion that I must have been knocked unconcoius more than twice in this story. Also I noticed that Jessie was missing. Almost certaintly gone off with the Large, Silverback, Alpha male, Gorilla, with whom she would have many offspring to teach her talents of sign language.
Jessie was gone forever. Tears soon flooded my eyes.
I also realized that, along with a very attractive young woman standing across the camp, sleeping, that I was the only one left alive.
Day 7- Mukenko
When I awoke I was being lifted above the ground in the comfort of a hot air baloon. The awe-inspiring site of the lost city of Zinj was awe-inspiring. I would never forget Jessie, the female mountain gorilla with a 620 word sign vocabulary. (Cont. in Credits)