Lou's Diamond Phillips Screwdriver
When he bought it, it cost him four grand
Specially made by the Craftsman Brand
It has never been removed from its original case
He keeps it locked up in his personal safe
One time a female seen it, she fainted, he had to revive her
It is not a myth, it does exist, Lou's Diamond Phillips Screwdriver
That is the reason it has never been brought out to show
The frivolous lawsuits would start to grow
He is a public figure so he is always under the paparazzi's microscope
He says he wishes that paparazzi would hang themselves, he would supply the
rope
The latest gossip is he was with a female, but no one could describe her
And there was also no sign of Lou's Diamond Phillips Screwdriver
Now he has agreed under a royalty contract with a trash magazine
That on New Year's Eve it will be seen
This however goes against the wishes of his financial advisor
Noww there's lawsuits pending from the public display of Lou's Diamond Phillips
Screwdriver
