Conrad The Male Mobile Stripper
Conrad got this insane idea
Buy a Pacer and ditch the KIa
He wanted to be his own boss and have his own business
No more girlfriend sohe dumped Elizabeth
He wanted a business where there would be a lot of heavy tippers
At that moment, he realizes he would become a mobile male stripper
He went to have lunch at the Dairy Queen Braizzer
While he waited for his stage name to be painted on the Driver's side door of his Pacer
It is an unwriiten law there is a stage name for every stripper
He gets back his pacer and reads the name, "Perfect, The Big Dipper."
He goes to show his son, after finishing lunch at the Dairy Queen
Tomorrow, his son will become an adult turning 18
His son's name is Skipper
His son tells Conrad, "I want in on this gig, I can be called the Little Dipper."
So the Pacer is returned to label the passenger side door
Conrad and Skipper walk to the local Thrift Store
They will need some costumes for entertainment purposes only
Conrad tells Skipper, "We are doing this from the heart, for all of those females who are lonely."
Soon, they land their first gig, at an elderly ladies assited living home
They were all on a fixed income, so it was like Old Mother Hubbard who went to the cupboard to get her poor dog a bone
They were paid with grocery coupons, Big Dipper and Little Dipper both were tired
What a kick in the ass, all of the coupns were expired
They soon land their second gig at a Male Stripper Club called The Loft
They would be the second act behind David Hasslehoff
David introduces himself, and Conrad asks, "Aren't the one who pissed off my cousin Nina?"
"And she is so much more meaner."
"And you are also the one, who after she dumped the frog, you wanted sloppy seconds with that pig?"
David replies back, "That's my past, this is my new gig."
David is getting ready to go on stage and tells Conrad, "Watch these moves Big Dipper."
They all three split the earnings, 35 dollars each for a night of being strippers
Conrad and Skipper both realize this stripper gig was a bad idea
They sell the Pacer as is and buy back their old Kia
