A Girl Named Puddin' | By: Eugene Carmen | | Category: Short Story - Funny Bookmark and Share

A Girl Named Puddin'


She is round and short, but very sweet
This is not the kind of girl for bare cupboards, she loves to eat
If you invite her to dinner, please be advised
She will want her second helpings twice
So budget your food bill considering her invitation
You will be cooking all night, so the next day for work, ask for vacation
If she comes in the kitchen, she will insist on fresh and hot cookin'
At 5ft 2, eyes of blue and 275, she is called Puddin'
She says she entered a non-televised world wide event, hotdog eating contest
against Kobyashi and won
It was rigged so he was handed the prize, a lot of favoritism from the judges who
all are from the land of the rising sun
Her toaster pastries must be Pop Tarts
On a flight she pays for an aisle and her own dinner cart
She demands that her food be cooked with utensils that are wooden
She is a wondrous creature and her name is Puddin'
The doctor tells her she must cut back on her intake or suffer a heart attack or a
stroke
She no longer drinks regular soda, it is now all the dollar menu items and a Diet
Coke
The last time I heard about her and her whereabouts
She lives above a seafood eatery and lives on oysters, refried beans and dishes
that complement Trout
So I say good luck on your endeavors, if you ever see her, I hope you wouldn't
She is always ready to eat, may we bless that girl named Puddin'
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